A newly separated mom asks:
My son's father and I are trying to come up with a reasonable visitation schedule that is best for my son. He wanted to do Mon, Wed, Friday and every other Sunday. I want a schedule with stability for him, and I don't think switching back and forth every other day is stability. I have never done this before so I want to know some sort of visitation schedule that would be best for a 18 month old.Shirley Cress Dudley responds:
Deciding the best visitation schedule can be tough. I agree with you that every other day could be confusing for your son and also confusing for you and your ex-spouse
There are several different types of visitation schedules that seem to be common among blended families: Shared Visitation: one week with one parent, and then one week with the other parent. Primary Custody: one parent has primary custody and the other parent sees the child every other weekend and 1-2 days (Tuesday and Thursday, or Wednesday) during the week.
What's important is that your son has a relationship with both mom and dad. You don't have to like your ex-spouse, but it's important to encourage your child to have a relationship with his dad, and speak positively about those visits.
You can try several different schedules until the two of you agree on what works out best for you and your ex. Your child will be fine with any of the schedules I mentioned, and most likely the schedule you mentioned also. (He would probably be the one the least confused.)
If you keep the main goal in mind, a relationship with both parents, any of these options will be fine.
Kindest Regards-
Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC NCC
Director of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center
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