I found this anonymous quote on the internet, the other day and sent it back into the world on Facebook, Linked-In and Twitter. Several folks commented that it was a wonderful statement for the New Year and could be a great New Year’s Resolution.
So- what do these words mean to me for the New Year?
Fear Less, Hope More
Whine Less, Breath More
Focus on the positive and don’t dwell on the negative. If we stay stagnant in the past, ruminating on our old mistakes and mishaps- we can’t move forward to the future. We can learn from our mistakes and progress to a more positive outcome. If your blended or step family wasn't as happy as you would want last year- make changes this year! Look for ways to view life more positively. There are a lot of difficulties of forming a blended family- but look on the positive side- you have a new family... a chance to start over and do it right this time.
Talk Less, Say More
How many times do we listen to someone say the same thing, over and over? How many times is that person ourselves? Think about your thoughts and make them meaningful.
Remember- our actions speak louder than our words. If we say one thing and do another, our credibility is lost. Model the behavior you believe. Live your life by your actions, not just your words. Your mate is watching, your kids and stepkids are watching. Set an example to them of how you want everyone treated in your stepfamily.
Hate Less, Love More
Focusing on negative thoughts, holding grudges, and storing anger uses up our energy in pointless frustration and worry. Treat others as you would like to be treated. Try to think of life from other's perspective. I know you are probably having difficult days with your ex, but try to love them (yes I said love them) in the name of your child. You are co-parents together, and although you no longer have a romantic relationship, you have a responsibility to do the best you can to parent your children.
I agree, this old Swedish proverb is a great way to start the year!
Shirley Cress Dudley is a marriage and family therapist. She is the founder of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center and author of Blended Family Advice. Shirley has a passion for helping blended and stepfamilies grow strong and be successful. Sign up for our Free newsletter and receive a Free Report- Top Ten Worst Mistakes You Can Make in Your Blended Family,
http://www.TheBlendedandStepFamilyResourceCenter.com
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