A reader asks: What happens when a parent marries someone who isn't suitable for their family and they don't encourage the family to get along? What could they do?
Shirley Cress Dudley responds:
Unfortunately, over 50% of second marriages end in divorce. If someone marries again because they look like a great mate, but aren't interested in being a step parent- the marriage is probably not going to be successful. The new partner is automatically a brand new step parent- whether they like it or not, and has the responsibility of helping to co-parent the kids (while the kids are in their home.) If the new partner has no interest in this- it's a definite problem.
Divorced moms and dads need to remember this when they re-enter the dating scene, looking for a partner. I also highly recommend premarital counseling for all couples- but especially for blended family couples. Then, they can discuss these issues ahead of time and figure out if they are truly a good match.
For more information, check out Blended Family Advice ebook- your instruction manual for blended families.
Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Blended Family Coach
How true. When you marry (or date someone) you are entering into a relationship with more than that person - kids, parents, friends all play a roll.
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