One of my kids just won't accept our new blended family

A blended family mom recently asked what can be done about her daughter who isn't accepting her new stepdad and the blended family. It's been several years, and all the other kids are adapting.


Shirley Cress Dudley responds:

You may not like this answer- but here is what I believe needs to happen:

Your daughter needs discipline.  She doesn’t have to like your husband or her step siblings, but she is required to be polite, friendly and respectful. If she is not, then she should experience consequences (by you- as the biological parent.)

Life changes, things happen to us that we can’t control, and we don’t like, but we have to adapt- that’s just life.  It’s time for her to learn how to adapt. As a parent, it’s your job to teach her.  By requiring her to adapt to her new blended family, you will be helping equip her for life. Don’t label her as non-adaptable- it’s basically just poor behavior and it needs to stop. She’s running the show by trying to getting things the way she wants them to be, 100% of the time- and that’s not life (not in a family, a marriage, a job, or anything.)

I recommend the book Blended Family Advice or also seeking blended family coaching, so that you have the support you need while making these changes in your parenting and in your family.

Good luck.

Kindest Regards,

Shirley

Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC NCC FACMPE

Shirley@BlendedFamilyAdvice.com

Director of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center